Today All Groan Up welcomes a guest post by Diane Pauley. She is a creative spirit, soul writer & awesome life coach. Find her at Postgradolescence or follow her at @wine_peace_love.
‘Inception’ was a pretty badass movie. And that’s just it; it was a movie, but what if that was your reality? So in order to live out your fantasies you’d be strapped to a chair, knocked out and made to believe that you were carrying out your dreams…when in actuality you were sleeping the entire time.
Reality check: this does not happen in ‘real life,’ but lo and behold most of us actually do live out ‘inception’ type lifestyles. If you think about it, we’re asleep a good majority of the time; wishing we were kickass federal agents, creative entrepreneurs or just plain awesome individuals.
But the sad reality is that most of us aren’t doing anything to make these dreams happen. We’re just living out the fantasies while our eyes are closed. Cue, ‘The Matrix’ soundtrack…
When we’re awake, going about our day-to-day lives, we’re repressing our true identities. We’re lying about who we really want to be and what we want to do with these precious moments we have on this earth. Are we scared to admit these wild and mesmerizing dreams out-loud? Yes!
Photo by Karen Ka Ying Wong – Creative Commons
We get degrees, certifications and end up stuck in dead-end jobs just wasting our time away because we’re fearful of the alternative. And what’s the alternative? It’s that somehow you can logically make your dreams come true in ‘real life.’ Whether by divine intervention or small, actionable steps you can achieve the so-called impossible.
Why is this so scary? It’s because most of us, myself included, have a hard time believing in our potential, capabilities and all-around genius. We don’t want to give an ounce of our willpower toying with the notion that our hopes are even worth a living, breathing chance.
And so we end up dying a slow death on the inside. We put out our flames of passion and replace them with mediocre ambitions stamped with a seal of approval by good ol’ society. We think we’re doing the ‘right’ thing, perhaps we even think we’re doing the noble thing by denying what we really want.
But when it comes down to it, what we’re actually doing is living up to someone else’s expectations for our lives. Mom & Pop’s expectations, maybe? Your college professor’s gung-ho advice, perhaps?
Whoever got into your head set-up the course that you’re currently on in some way, shape or form. But guess what? You’re steering the course now; you’re behind the wheel, not them!
So why are you doing what you’re doing? Is it to impress these people, have them pat you on the back and say, ‘Job well done’? Sure, that’s swell and all, but in order to make someone else happy, you’ve been kicking your dreams to the curb. You’ve been living a lie, plain ‘n simple. And now it’s time to finally wake up.
You don’t wanna end up stuck in la-la land forever, do you? It’s time to turn your dreams into your reality. And you wanna know a secret? You have all of the badass skills to make it happen.
This post is so true for many people in their lives right now. I struggle with remaining confident in the decisions I make about be true to my talents and gifts because so often the world and family will shoot them down. I am the Host of a show called Xtra-Ordianariness with Brytnei Elle, and I interview ordinary young people who do extraordinary things with their lives and follow their passions. Its so hard to be you in world that expects you to conform and not be extraordinary. My parents think Im crazy for being me, and keep encouraging me to get a good government job but I don’t think I have to do that to be secure and successful. They helped me get through two degrees and I guess want some return on their investment. lol.. thanks so much for this post and I would love to interview you Paul at some point for an episode for my show. Check out my first episode here and keep up the great work!!
Part 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pOI2fIGSFc
Part 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pq7bf0Xq5gU
Brytnei! Your comment simply made my day. I can tell that you already have an AMAZING personality & a creative soul. Serious kudos to you for pursuing something that lights you up. Not enough people have the courage to stand up for what they believe in & do something they love. When they finally ‘wake up’ they think it’s too late. But it’s never too late to begin again.
And I understand about people not ‘getting’ it. They can’ t even begin to imagine the kind of gusto it takes to do something incredibily creative & all your own. As you progress even further in your awesome pursuits, some people will fall away because they just don’t understand. But it’s okay & take heart in the fact that the ‘right’ people will come into your life exactly when you need them.
I’d be absolutely honored to do an interview with you! Until then, keep making your impact on the world.
P.S. — You’re doing great:)
Diane, I love how you compare our “day dreaming” to Inception. I totally get that. Reaching out and grabbing something you want in a career or personal life is for some reason terrifying. Maybe, we’re just scared. But I think you’re right… we already have the skills necessary.
Hey Katie! Thanks so much for replying:)
I absolutely LOVE the way you reflect on the idea of ‘day dreaming’ & the concept of sleeping while we’re awake. It’s so true that we can be scared sh*tless when it comes to making a change or taking a risk (personal or career-wise).
And it’s because we weren’t taught or trained on how to function outside of the ‘confines’ of a structured environment. We’re taught to ‘fear’ the unknown & anytime we lose CONTROL we freak out.
But there’s an upside. You. Me. We. ALL of us do have the badass skills necessary (within us) to lead the kickass lives we dream of. It can become our reality.
We just have to test out the waters & as Nike so finely puts it, ‘Just Do It.’
And remember: You totally got this!
I never really thought about why we were scared like that. How you point out we weren’t taught to live outside of a structured environment is totally true! Should have added that and how to pick a husband 101! Work and marriage are two of the biggest and most time consuming decisions we make in our entire life… but we’re not taught about it. Makes no sense why its not taught, but makes complete sense why we don’t know what we’re doing… well at least at first. 🙂