Success is overrated. Those people living their dreams, making money, making a difference, creating, inventing, leading, yada-yada-blah-gag-me-with-a-stapler.

No, give me that 8-5 job surrounded by rainy-day-cubicle where I can master Cubicleness – the art of taking forty-five minutes of actual work and spreading it over eight hours.

Give me day after day where I have been on the Internet for so long I have literally run out of things to search for.

I don’t want to make sh*t happen. No, no, no. I want to be that co-worker who gave up caring about their work 15 years prior, but has become that large boulder in the office – unmovable and ready to crush you with one wrong look. That’s the sweet spot that I know I can thrive in.

But how do I get there? How do I make sure I live a life of Un-Success, where I scold “dreamers” who think they’re actually supposed to enjoy their work? Freaks.

To read these seven tips of un-success, head on over to Jenny Blake’s Life After College where I’m contributing today. I pinky-swear you won’t regret the three second Internet journey to get there. Check out these tips to make sure you’re not living a life committed to un-success.