The Secret to Being More Successful

The #1 Reason You're Not More Successful

 

What if I told you I know the reason why you might not be experiencing more success?

And it’s because of two simple mistakes, that if fixed, would guarantee success from Day One.

I fully expected to walk straight into a crazy-successful twentysomething life with accolades, salaries, bonuses, a big-old-fat-book-deal, and a plethora of people who wanted to learn my secrets to success, all by 23 years old. Maybe 25 if I really hit some serious setbacks.

Instead my twenties felt lathered in UnSuccess.

Nothing went according to plan. My twenties felt like I was sitting on a suitcase on the side of the road just hoping success would drive by and pick me up. Can you relate?

But then a secret to success hit me like a tennis ball to the face hit by Serena Williams–it hurt, but it woke me up.

The Secret to Being More Successful

Let’s start with the video below. Pay close attention. (If you’re reading this by email, you might need to click to the article on All Groan Up to watch).

Pretty crazy right? The video above is an example of the scientific theory called Inattentional Blindness.

Inattentional Blindness def – “The failure to notice an unexpected stimulus that is in one’s field of vision when other attention-demanding tasks are being performed.”

You’re literally blind to the moonwalking bear because your attention is focused elsewhere.

Same for us and success.

The #1 reason you’re not experiencing more success – you’ve never decided what you’re actually looking for.

How can you expect to catch and hold something that you can’t see?

So many of us are blind to success because we’re focused on the wrong things.

The #1 Reason You're Not More Successful

We complain about a lack of opportunities as they pass right in front of our face.

We can’t see success because the wrong things are holding our attention. 

We had a dream of making a difference or braggable amounts of money, but we didn’t have a strategic plan on how we were going to get there.

Success was just going to kind of happen.

When the only thing that happened was anxiety, fear, and depression by an apparent lack of it.

As I write in my book 101 Secrets for your Twenties,

Success is the most subjective word in the history of subjective words….If you don’t define success, it will stay an unidentified flying object that you’ll never take a picture of.

Don’t believe me? Go out, stop ten different people, and ask them how they would define personal success.

You’ll get 9 1/2 different answers.

Success is like a chameleon, changing colors depending on the environment.

You must define success for your own life.

How can you pursue success if it’s an urban legend you’ve only heard stories about?

I wrote before on All Groan Up about nostalgia being a sneaky enemy of success. Now it’s time to create a vision for success. Literally write down a few sentences on your definition of success for your life.

Now that you have your vision, here’s one more important MUST to achieving success to make sure your definition becomes an encouraging lifestyle, instead of an overwhelming once-in-a-while.

The Key to Achieving Success

When you’re defining success in your life, remember that success is not only in the positive outcome.

The heart of success is in positive, consistent every-day-ness.

Success is in the hours of hard work, the good decisions, and perseverance that leads to the positive outcome.

Success happens in achieving small obtainable goals, each one a new thread in weaving a great work.

Really the billboard moment when people pat you on the back for “achieving success” is not really true success. The positive outcome really is more a product of success, not actually the success itself.

Success happens in the details.

If success is only in the final outcome, then you’ll rarely feel like a success and the positive outcomes will be rare and few between.

If you’re able to cultivate the success of the every day, then you are a success, not just experiencing random spurts of it.

If you define success and take one step towards it today, you are a success.

Don’t just experience success. Be a success. 

I’d love to hear from you in the comments below:

Share your 1-2 sentence definition of success. 

10 Comments

  1. Beate

    How’dy!

    I’m not sure if this is the place to put this comment, but I’m gonna do it anyways. I just wanted to say thank you. I’ve been reading quite a few of the posts on this page for the last few days, and it has helped me put my life (and my QLC) in a little perspective. Don’t really have much else to say, but thought I should say thank you. So…thank you! – for giving me a little peace of mind in the middle of my stormy 20something-crisis.

    Keep up the good work!

    Reply
    • Paul Angone

      Beate – Thank you for these kinds words and I’m honored that All Groan Up has been encouraging you. That’s awesome. Thank you for encouraging me in return!

      Reply
  2. Melissa

    Holy cow, does this post hit the nail on the head!

    It’s so true that success is different to everyone. Sometimes I think I get too caught up in being everyone *else’s* version of success – which is impossible because I don’t know and even if I could guess, it would probably be different anyway.

    To me, sucess is being able to make mistakes without freaking out and learning from them. Sucess is being able to go through life without fear but trusting that you will learn along the way.

    Reply
    • admin

      Well said Melissa! Thanks for sharing your definition.

      Reply
  3. Allison

    Alright … Success …

    Whats your opinion on practicality?

    Reply
  4. Beth Anne

    This is one of my current goals as I’m not even sure what success is…I think right now it would be not living at home and making enough money to live on my own…..

    Reply
    • admin

      Great start Beth Anne!

      Reply
  5. Neil Bruinsma

    I love this video haha!! And what a point! Clarity is power!

    Reply
  6. Jan Koch

    Hey Paul,

    I define success as the ability to work on projects you love and helping people with the outcome you’re producing (I hate the phrase “creating value”).

    Therefore I totally agree with you, because only making small steps consistently will bring you towards your goals.

    I’m going to quit my job next week and this is the first bigger success story in my entrepreneurial journey 🙂

    Looking forward to read more from you!

    Jan

    Reply
    • admin

      Love this Jan. Thanks for sharing your definition! Congrats on the big leap!

      Reply

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